A Bond Like No Other
by LLTogetherForever
Summary: Sometimes a love like theirs can never go away. Luke and Lorelai.
1. Preview Chapter

**A/N: Hey guys, this is just a short "preview" chapter of my next story. I'm waiting to hear back from my beta, so I figured I'd write a little something until then. Reviews are definitely welcomed. Also, you'll notice that this story is Untitled. That's not the name of the story; I just don't have a title yet. I'd love to hear suggestions.**

**…………………………………………………………………………………LL……...**

Luke stood behind the counter of the diner, staring out the window. Every table of the small restaurant was taken, every seat at the counter filled. Luke just looked out the window. The roar of the people talking to each other sounded snowy to him. He focused on his thoughts. Lorelai went to Paris with Christopher. Yeah, so? Why should he care? He thought some more. What are they doing there? Why did they go to Paris? Lane hustled past him, plates in each hand and running up her arm. Luke thought. Did he do the right thing, telling her they should go back to being the coffee worshipper and coffee provider? He thought not.

The days since Luke had heard of Lorelai and Christopher's trip from Miss Patty have been lumped together, one rolling past after another. Nights were just periods of darkness, days were bright, except for when it rained and the sky got dark. Dark. That's what Luke wanted. To crawl into bed and hide under the covers. To protect himself from the harshness of the real world. It was unlike Luke to be afraid. He was usually the big macho man who lifted weights and watches football. Except when he was alone with Lorelai. No! Stop thinking about her, he told himself. Just stop it.

"Luke?" Kirk asked. Luke tore his eyes away from the safeness of the windows. Windows were like a view into another world. He could see everything from the diner. He watched people stroll by, hand-in-hand.

"What, Kirk?"

"Can I have some more coffee?" Kirk pushed his mug towards Luke, who had reentered the staring contest with the window. "Luke?"

"What, Kirk?"

"Can I have some more coffee?" Kirk pointed at his coffee mug, now resting in front of Luke.

"No! No coffee! No coffee for anyone!" Luke shouted out to the entire diner. Every pair of eyes turned to look at him. Luke turned to the coffee pot and emptied its contents onto the floor next to him. "There. See? No coffee." He dropped the pot as well, joining the pool of brown liquid on the floor.

It was her life, coffee. No one could have it until he kissed her over the counter and poured an unforgiving amount into a mug, just for her. Lorelai deserved the best, and his coffee was the best. He was the best. Chris was a good-for-nothing guy who only wanted Lorelai to hold onto memories of the past. Luke really loved her. She was a goddess in his eyes. She deserved to be worshipped. Chris couldn't worship her like he could.

Kirk got up from the counter and peered over the counter. "Luke, you made a mess." Luke glared at him.

"It doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore." He stepped over the intentional spill and disappeared behind the curtains. His footsteps pounding on the stairs and the slamming of the door caused each and every pair of eyes to jerk back to the spot where they knew the stairs were. Some people got up and left.

Lane stood awestruck, staring blindly at the counter. She pulled out her phone and dialed Rory's number in New Haven.

"Hello?"

"Rory. Good. Luke's having a breakdown. A Lorelai breakdown. Can you come to the diner and talk to him?" Lane asked. She tilted her head to lock the phone in place between her chin and shoulder, while easing a plate onto a table that no longer held it's customers.

"Now? Like, right this second?" Rory asked.

"Preferably. Did you hear the part about the breakdown? Or the part about it being about Lorelai?" Lane asked.

"Yeah, yeah. What happened?"

"He yelled. And dumped all the coffee on the floor." Lane replied.

"No way."

"Way! Are you coming?"

"On my way." Rory hung up the phone. Lane closed her phone and returned it to its rightful spot in her jeans pocket. She picked up the plate she rested on the table and carried it to Kirk.

"Free food?" She asked.

"You bet."

**A/N2: So there it is. Like it? **


	2. Fancy Dinners and Broken Hearts

**Purplekirbyshaft: **Thanks for the name suggestion, it was good, and thanks for the review!

**Jen, Lil M.A.K., LLfan, sarahb2007, LukePlusLorelaiEquals L O V E, Mrs. Lucas McDreamy, LukeanLor383 :** Thanks!

**Friendlyneighborhoodlorelai:** I agree that the Luke/Rory father-daughter bond has been one of the high points of the show. I hope to show that in this chapter.

**Wish I was Mrs. Danes 117: **I hope your hunch comes true! Thanks for the review!

**A/N: I am astonished (but happy) with all the reviews I received for the preview chapter. You guys are amazing. Keep it up!**

**Previously:**

"_Rory. Good. Luke's having a breakdown. A Lorelai breakdown. Can you come to the diner and talk to him?" Lane asked. She tilted her head to lock the phone in place between her chin and shoulder, while easing a plate onto a table that no longer held it's customers._

"_Yeah, yeah. What happened?"_

"_He yelled. And dumped all the coffee on the floor." Lane replied._

"_On my way." Rory hung up the phone._

…………………………………………………………………………**.LL…………...**

"Lane! Where's Luke?" Rory asked, stumbling into the diner. Lane pointed towards the stairs. Rory dashed across the restaurant and past the curtains, barreling up the stairs and pounding on the apartment door.

"Whaddya want?" Luke yelled out. "I'm busy!" Busy? Rory knocked again.

"Luke! It's Rory! Open up!" Luke appeared at the door.

"Rory, oh. I didn't—"

"It's okay. What's going on?" Rory asked. She walked past Luke and into the apartment. It was a mess. The last time she could remember the apartment looking like this was when Jess moved in here. Luke must really be upset. He shut the door and turned to face her.

"What are you doing here? Don't you have school?"

"I don't have any classes this afternoon, and Lane called me." Rory stated, crossing her arms over her chest. She planned on making Luke tell her what was wrong without her asking.

"Oh, she did, did she? Why would she do something like that?" Luke asked. Luke, although he knew very well that Rory came to talk to him about Lorelai, wasn't talking. She was still her daughter, and he was still Lorelai's ex. Anything that came out of Luke's mouth would return straight back to Lorelai's ears. An ocean couldn't stop those two from talking, and Luke knew that quite well.

"I think she thought you needed a friend. You know, someone to talk to?" Rory stepped closer to him. "Anything you want to, uh, _talk_ about?"

"Nope. Nothing. You?"

"I got nothing." Rory turned around. "Place looks nice."

…………………………………………………………………**LL………………………..**

Across and ocean and thousands of miles away, Lorelai and Christopher were sitting in a fancy restaurant right in the heart of Paris. Lorelai was having a hard time paying attention to Chris. It reminded her of the time she and Luke went to a restaurant in Hartford, just a mere week before she ran into April at the diner filling salt and pepper shakers. The restaurant had some strange foreign name. She had forgotten it. It wasn't a date either Luke or Lorelai wanted to remember. It was a quiet place, a fancy one where everyone whispered and the music in the background was all strings. She vaguely remembered what they talked about, or if they even talked. Their relationship had already begun to fall apart. They weren't going as strong as they had the year before, when they were both floating and happy and nothing could get in their way.

Now, sitting in this fancy restaurant with Chris across from her instead of Luke just made everything worse. Lorelai pretended to be happy, and Chris was falling for it. As much as Lorelai wanted their relationship to work, it just wasn't going to.

"This is nothing like Sniffy's." Lorelai said while poking at her lamb.

"Sniffy's? What's Sniffy's" Chris asked, focusing his eyes on her. She looked down as if his gaze was burning her eyes.

"Nothing. Nevermind, it was stupid anyways."

"Okay." Chris returned to looking at his dish. Lorelai put her fork down.

"I have to use the bathroom. I'll be back soon." She stood up and Chris nodded his head at her.

"Are you done eating?"

"Yes." Lorelai placed her napkin on the table and turned from the table. All around them were couples. Everywhere. Most of them seemed happy, except for the one that was fighting over a place setting. Place settings. Wouldn't that be nice if our only worries in life were place settings? She passed by an older couple holding hands under the table. Lorelai smiled. She wanted that. She really, really wanted that. Until recently, she always thought that Luke would be the guy she spent the rest of her life with. That he'd be the one who'd father the rest of her children, he'd be the one she'd hold hands with under a table. Everything was so complicated now.

She pushed open the bathroom door. There was an attendant sitting on a chair next to the door, which Lorelai excused by asking for more tissues. Once the attendant left, she checked under all the stalls for people. No one. She locked the door and took out her phone. The number she dialed was one she knew by heart.

"Hello?" Rory said.

"Hey, kid. Can you talk? Or are you in class?" Lorelai asked. She looked at herself in the mirror. Without knowing it, she had been letting tears fall from her eyes as she trekked from her and Chris's table to the bathroom.

"Um, well I'm sort of busy right now. Is it important?" Rory asked. A man's voice came through in the background.

"Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"Was that Luke?" Lorelai asked. Of course it was Luke. She knew Luke's voice anywhere. When they first started dating, she spent hours listening to his messages over and over again on the answering machine. Only to hear that voice again. Oh, what she'd give just to hear him talk to her again.

"Luke? No, it was, uh, some guy talking in the elevator." Rory tried to cover up.

"Elevator? Where are you?" Lorelai asked.

"New Haven," Rory lied. Lorelai had enough.

"Rory, I may be miles away, but I'd know Luke's voice anywhere." There was silence on the other end of the line.

"I don't want to hurt you."

"Kid, I _am _hurt. I'll be hurt for the rest of my life." Again, silence.

"I didn't want it to be weird, you know, me talking to him." Lorelai smiled. That was her Rory. Always trying to protect her.

"Thanks, hun. But what are you doing with Luke?"

"You sure you want to know?" Rory asked.

"I think so." Lorelai said. She wiped the tears from under her eyes. She heard Rory tell Luke she'd be right back. A door closed in the background.

"Well, Lane called me a while ago and told me to come down to the diner. Apparently he had a major freak-out. About you." Rory said.

"Oh."

"Are you okay?" Rory asked. There was the prodigal daughter again.

"I'm good."

"Good. Now, what did you call about?" Rory asked.

"Oh, it's nothing. Nevermind."

"You sure?"

"Mhmm."

"Alright. Call me tomorrow, okay?" Rory asked. It was a question she shouldn't have even bothered asking.

"Of course. I love ya, kid."

"I love you too, mom."

"Bye." Lorelai said. Rory repeated. Both girls hung up their phones. Lorelai replaced hers in her bag and took a fancy napkin out of the dish on the counter. She wiped her eyes with it, and then disposed of it into the designated bin. She didn't care what she looked like; just unlocked the door and began back to the table.

**A/N2: So, this was officially chapter one, although it continues from the preview chapter. Again, a little shorter than the rest of the chapters, but I got stuck, so I stopped. Like it so far? Let me know what you think.**


	3. Champagne and Resemblance

**Wish I was Mrs. Danes 117:** Haha, you'll see.  Thanks for the review!

**Mrs. Lucas McDreamy: **I will, I will, I will! Thanks for the review!

**ImOzGosh: **Those are my two favorite parts of this story so far. I'm glad you liked them too. Thanks for the review!

**Tooky close pin: **I really liked the idea that Rory would drop everything for Luke, so I wrote it in. I'm glad you liked that. Thanks for the review!

**A/N: Again, I am so excited about all the reviews that are coming in for this story. Keep 'em coming!**

**Previously: **

_"Alright. Call me tomorrow, okay?" Rory asked. It was a question she shouldn't have even bothered asking._

_"Of course. I love ya, kid."_

_"I love you too, mom."_

_"Bye." Lorelai said. Rory repeated. Both girls hung up their phones. Lorelai replaced hers in her bag and took a fancy napkin out of the dish on the counter. She wiped her eyes with it, and then disposed of it into the designated bin. She didn't care what she looked like; just unlocked the door and began back to the table._

……………………………………………………………………**.LL………………...**

Rory walked back into Luke's apartment after talking to Lorelai. Half of her wanted to tell Luke she called, but the other thought she shouldn't. She plopped on the couch and looked around for Luke. He was sitting at the table, nursing a beer. It was the third since she had arrived, but who knows how many he downed before she got there. Rory never remembered Luke as a big drinker, although he always had one with Lorelai when he was over. Lorelai had mentioned that he didn't like champagne. Rory thought that was strange, seeing the predicament he and her mother were in. Champagne was used for celebrating. Towards the end of their relationship, there had been nothing to celebrate, nothing to drink to. Champagne, in Rory's eyes, symbolized willingness, as well. When you drink it, you're happy about whatever you're toasting to. Luke was never happy when he had to drink champagne. Rory and Lorelai talked about this once, Lorelai dismissed it as ridiculous and Rory dropped the subject. It was changed to Richard Gere's penis.

Being the amazing person she was, Rory immediately went to see what was wrong. Luke ran his right hand through his hair and tilted his beer to his mouth with the other. Rory sat down at the table across from him, and stared. Finally, Luke looked up.

"What?" He asked.

"What's really wrong, Luke? I'm not stupid. I can tell you're thinking about something." Rory replied, she rested her head in her hands and put her elbows on the table in front of her. "Tell me."

Luke thought about really opening up to Rory. Yes, she was Lorelai's kid and that meant she'd hear about it eventually, but was that such a bad thing? This was torture. He decided to tell Rory. The worst that could happen is that Lorelai would find out and think he was desperate, right? Well, he was, and he didn't care who knew it anymore.

"I miss your mom." He finally said. Rory didn't say anything. Luke took a drink. "A lot."

Rory looked into his eyes. They were filled with pain. The pain you feel when the person you love goes away. She looked the same right after she had found out about Logan sleeping around while they were "on a break." They were clouded over, almost. They were no longer their usual vibrant blue, but gray.

"I know."

Luke looked up at Rory. "Do you think she'd talk to me if I called her?" Rory thought again about telling Luke that Lorelai had just called, but again, decided not to.

"I don't know, Luke." Rory said, shrugging her shoulders slightly.

They sat in silence. Luke finished his beer and tossed the can into the garbage. Rory got up and got him another. She placed it down in front of him. Luke didn't touch it, he didn't even notice it was there. He was staring at Rory.

He looked into her bright eyes. They were Lorelai's. Some people say that a mother and daughter with similar eyes have a strong bond. It was definitely true for Rory and Lorelai. Rory's eyes, like Lorelai's, were piercing. They went right through Luke like a dagger. He tore his gaze away from her eyes and studied the rest of her face. Rory sat silently. She knew exactly what Luke was doing, but she didn't know whether or not to let him, or to stop him. Maybe it made the hurt go away, to look at her. Maybe he was hurting himself more. She didn't know. Rory let Luke do what he wanted, for stopping him could be the worst. They had different noses, he saw. Rory must have Christopher's nose. Luke never noticed his, the only times he saw him up close, both Rory and Logan were in a state of partial undress, or he was too busy socking him in the face. He looked down her face an inch to her lips. They weren't the same, but not entirely different. Lorelai's lips weren't as long from left to right. Oh, how he missed those lips. He'd spent all night kissing them until they were swollen. He loved watching her react to him.

Finally, Rory stopped him by looking down. "Luke, maybe I could call her, and you two could talk." She spoke quietly. Luke shook his head.

"No. I have to be able to do it myself. I have to pick up the phone, and dial, and say 'hello'. I can't do that yet."

"I understand." Rory pointed to the beer she placed in front of him. "Beer?"

"Ugh. Definitely."

……………………………………………………………………………**..LL……………**

Lorelai shielded her eyes as she walked back to her and Chris's table. He was sitting there, looking through a dessert menu. She sat back down across from him. He didn't look up. She played with her napkin before laying it back down across her lap. He didn't look up.

A little while later, a waitress showed up next to their table. Chris's gaze didn't leave the menu.

"Would you like dessert?" She asked. Still, no Christopher. Lorelai shook her head.

"No thanks, I'm full." That got Chris's attention.

"You, Lorelai Gilmore, are full?" He asked. Lorelai nodded her head. She didn't want to tell him the real reason she wouldn't eat. Nothing else was going into her stomach tonight. If she ate, Lorelai felt as if she'd burst for sure.

"Alright. Nothing for me, either." Chris said. He handed the dessert menu to the waitress. She walked away to the kitchen.

"What's wrong, Lor?" Chris asked.

"Me? Oh, nothing."

"Do you want to go back to the hotel?" Chris asked. He covered her hand with his.

"I want to go home. Let's get Gigi back, and go home."

"You know we can't do that." Chris said.

"Why not?" Lorelai asked, standing up. She crossed her arms. It felt good to be hovering above Chris. It was like she was in control.

"Because she's visiting Sherry."

"So what?" Lorelai asked. "I want to go home. I miss Rory."

"I can get you a ticket for the morning." Chris said, he stood up as well.

"Just me?"

"I can't leave my daughter here alone, Lor." Chris said. Lorelai began walking away from the table.

"I'll see you at the hotel."

……………………………………………………………………………**LL…………**

"You ready to try yet?" Rory asked Luke, who was now finishing his fifth beer.

"Nope."

"Okay."

……………………………………………………………………………**LL……………**

**A/N2: I got a little stuck at the end so I stopped it. Review, please!**


	4. A Forest and A Phone Call

**ImOzGosh: **Hmmmm…

**Cywen69: **Ugh, those writers apparently weren't thinking during that Paris episode. I like my version better too. Haha. Thanks for the review!

**Borncountry88: **Thanks! Here ya go!

**Sammy: **Thanks!

**Wish I was Mrs. Danes 177: **I think it's really cool how one line can stop you like that. Here's a longer chapter, just for you!

**ggpassion: **I'm with you, when you say that Lorelai hasn't been acting like herself lately. Personally, I think its lack of ASP in her blood. I tried to bring the old Rory back; she's been a little weird lately too. Thanks for the review!

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry this took so long. It's a little longer than the past chapters to make up for that. Also, I took a little "creative liberty" in Rory's age. My beta pointed out to me that Luke wouldn't have known Rory until she was 11 or 12, but I have in here that she was 8. Read and Review, please!**

**Previously:**

"_So what?" Lorelai asked. "I want to go home. I miss Rory."_

"_I can get you a ticket for the morning." Chris said, he stood up as well._

"_Just me?"_

"_I can't leave my daughter here alone, Lor." Chris said. Lorelai began walking away from the table._

"_I'll see you at the hotel."_

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

"_You ready to try yet?" Rory asked Luke, who was now finishing his fifth beer._

"_Nope."_

"_Okay."_

…………………………………………………………………………………**LL………..**

Lorelai returned to the hotel Chris-less and broken hearted. She tossed her purse to the floor and dropped her jacket on the bed, sitting down next to it. Chris had called her phone seven times since she left the restaurant an hour ago, but she hadn't cared enough to check her messages.

She wondered what Luke was doing right now. Was Rory still with him? What were they talking about? She knew it was all about her, of course. Luke seemed to have taken the break-up harder than Lorelai had, since he had to deal not only with her leaving him, but with her going back to sleep with Christopher on the same night. It wasn't like Lorelai didn't care, it wasn't like that. She just knew her actions would have consequences, and by doing what she did, those consequences would hurt people. Maybe that's why she did it.

Maybe it wasn't. Maybe she just needed to be showed that she was loved. Sure, she knew Luke loved her, but he didn't show it anymore. There was the occasional kiss, but nothing like there usually was. Chris always showed his love for her. Always. It was part of the reason Lorelai kept on going back to him. No matter what was going on, Chris could always stop whatever he's feeling and love her unconditionally.

Sitting on the bed in the hotel room, Lorelai realized there was nothing to do. While she waited for Chris to come back and make her talk to him, she texted Rory, saying that she was back at the hotel, but didn't say anything else. Rory's response was a simple, "OK."

Lorelai turned to look out the window. The lights of the Paris streets were burning, lighting the beautiful sidewalks and roads leading to unknown places. She got up off the bed to stand by the nearest window. She leaned on the window sill, and peered out over the street. No one was out except for a woman and a little girl. Lorelai thought back to when Rory was that small.

Once, Rory had wanted to decorate the house like a forest. She went outside and pulled out grass from the front yard and threw it on the floor in the living room. She gathered leaves that had fallen from the trees and put them all over the couch and TV. Lorelai watched her daughter transform their home into an eight-year-olds outside wonderland, smiling from the second the first blade of grass was dropped until the last leaf was put on the couch. The house was a mess, and would need to be cleaned, but it was worth the smile on her daughter's face. Later that night, when Rory was asleep in her room, Lorelai called Luke to come over and help her clean up. He was happy to do it, of course.

Lorelai stopped right there. If she thought any more, she would start thinking about how they sat on the leaf-free couch and drank, how he put his arm around her shoulders, and how they were interrupted by Rory's nightmare cries. She wondered what could have happened if Rory stayed asleep.

Behind her, the door opened and closed softly. Lorelai continued to look out the window as footsteps got closer and closer to her. A hand was placed on her shoulder as she turned around and looked Chris in the face. He had the same look on his face that Luke did when she broke up with him.

"We need to talk," Chris said. Lorelai lifted her head up and nodded. She pushed his hand off or her shoulder and went to sit on the bed. He followed.

"You can't do this to me, Christopher."

"Lor, you know I can't leave Gigi alone, and I'm not taking her away from her mother," Chris said, stroking her head. Lorelai took a deep breath.

"Do you understand that the reason Luke and I aren't together anymore was because he loved his daughter more than he loved me? I can't take that again," Lorelai said, fighting through tears.

"It's a whole different kind of love, Lorelai. I could never love you the way I love Gigi, and I could never love Gigi, or even Rory for that matter, the way I love you. It's just different."

"I know that. I have a kid, remember?" Lorelai responded. Chris looked away for a second.

"I understand that you have needs that need to be met. I do, I really do. But you need to understand that whether or not those needs are met right away have nothing to do with how much I love you, or want to be with you." Lorelai rested her forehead on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

…………………………………………………………………………………**..LL………**

"How 'bout now?" Rory asked Luke. He continued staring over her shoulder, the same way he had for the past hour. He was quiet, and most likely drunk. He shook his head, and took another swig of beer.

"Now." He said. Rory perked up.

"Okay! I'll get the phone for you." She popped out of the chair and grabbed his phone. "Should I dial for you?"

"Mmmm."

"I'll take that as a yes." She dialed the digits of Lorelai's cell phone and handed it to Luke.

…………………………………………………………………………………**..LL………**

Chris noticed that Lorelai's phone was ringing before she even did. "Lor?"

"Hmm?"

"Your phone. It's vibrating." Chris closed his eyes, knowing what was coming next.

"Dirty!" She exclaimed, while getting up and grabbing her phone out of her purse, which was still lying behind her on the bed.

"I walked right into that one." Chris laughed. Lorelai nodded. She looked at the caller ID.

"It's Luke." She told him.

"Right. I'll just—" Chris pointed at the door. Lorelai, once again, nodded as Christopher got up and left.

"Hello?"

"Hi." Luke said.

"Uh, hi." Lorelai said.

"I love you."

"What?"

"I love you." Luke said again.

"Are you drunk?"

"Yes." Luke said. "Rory told me to tell you that."

"Rory's still there?"

"How did you know?"

"Uh, mother's intuition?" Lorelai awkwardly replied.

"Oh, that's cool."

"Yeah."

"I love you." Luke said for the third time.

"I-I don't know what to say to that, Luke."

"Say, I love you." Luke advised.

"I don't know if I can." Lorelai admitted. It was true. All this time she had been thinking about how she wanted to be with Luke, and how she imagined the couple holding hands under the table were she and Luke, but now after being with Christopher, she realized that maybe she has what she's needed all along.

"Okay. Then bye."

"Bye, Luke." Lorelai closed her phone and opened the door to let Chris back in.

"He told me he loved me," Lorelai said to Chris, "But I think he was drunk." Chris took her into his arms and held her, and after a minute or two, he led her to their bed and tucked her in. She was asleep in minutes.

…………………………………………………………………**.LL……………………….**

"So, what'd she say?" Rory asked Luke, who had hung up the phone and skidded it across the table to Rory.

"Nothing important." Luke said. He couldn't, even in his drunken state, admit that she said she didn't know whether or not Lorelai loved him anymore. It was way too much to bear.

"Oh, okay." Rory said quietly. She figured that he would talk to her eventually, she got him talking last time.

"You should probably go, Rory."

"Oh, well, if you want me to. I don't have anything to do tonight."

"I need to think, by myself, if I don't fall asleep first." Luke said.

"Well, alright. Call me if you need _anything_."

"You're a great kid, Rory. But I won't need anything. Go, enjoy your night." Luke waved her off. She got up and kissed his cheek, then left him sitting alone at the table, beer in hand, ready for the most exhausting night of his life.

………………………………………………………………………**.LL………………...**

**A/N: Okay, that wasn't too much longer, but I get stuck after a while. Like it? Thanks to my beta, Katie. Review please!**


	5. Chaos in the City of Lights

**Borncountry88: Yes, and thanks for the review!**

**Cywen69: It'll get better. I actually don't like seeing her like this and I'm getting sick of writing her like this. I won't be doing it for too much longer. Read and enjoy! Thanks for the review!**

**Baron Sengir: Thanks, here you go!**

**Sarahb2007: Thanks!**

**A/N: Alrighty. This chapter took me forever to finally figure out what I wanted to happen in it. Sorry about that. It's here now, so please review, I won't ask for anything else except Luke and Lorelai to get back together already…**

_**Previously:**_

"_He told me he loved me," Lorelai said to Chris, "But I think he was drunk."_

"_You're a great kid, Rory. But I won't need anything. Go, enjoy your night." Luke waved her off. She got up and kissed his cheek, then left him sitting alone at the table, beer in hand, ready for the most exhausting night of his life._

Early morning in the Gilmore house was hated. Therefore, early morning in Lorelai and Chris's hotel room was the same. Lorelai was awakened by a kiss from Chris, at a time much too early for anyone with her first and last name to be awake at. Looking out through the window that had had its curtain's open, Lorelai saw it raining. She was set to go home this afternoon, using the ticket Christopher had gotten her online after she stated she wanted to leave. She was still mad at him for that, whether or not she showed she was.

While Chris was in the shower, Lorelai got out of bed and sat down at the hotel room desk. She took out a piece of stationary to write a letter to Luke. Not to send, but to simply let her feelings out.

Her dream the night before had been interesting. Normally, after an interesting dream like this one, Lorelai would consult Rory on its meaning. This time, she didn't take the time to do so, but looked it up in the dream book she bought while shopping earlier in the week. Her imagination had sent her back to Star's Hollow, back to Luke's diner, back to that terrible night that led to her current relationship with Chris. Lorelai watched that night's events play out in slow motion. First, coming into the diner and asking Luke to elope with her, and then taking it outside. There was the part about the purple wallpaper, visiting Anna, all things that didn't mean anything in the big picture. As she watched herself walk away, she turned back to Luke. He was crying. Luke was crying. She turned to look back at herself wrapping her shirt around her body. She had never turned back to look at Luke. She had never given him a second chance.

How many second chances had Luke given her? Countless. He forgave her when she came to him in Doose's, he forgave her when she didn't tell him Chris called, and he even forgave her in his heart when she walked away from him. But Lorelai had never _truly_ forgiven him for anything. She was still holding that grudge against him for not telling her about April the day she came to the diner to rip a hair from his head. Of course, she knew this had nothing to do with April. She and Luke had major communication problems. They didn't share their feelings like they did in the beginning of their relationship, and in her heart she knew that this was what killed them.

She began the letter at a slow pace, writing sentence by sentence from her heart. Lorelai wrote everything down on paper that she never could tell Luke. She wrote about how hurt she was when she walked into the diner that day and spoke to April. She wrote about the way it felt to really know it was over. That was the day they had run into each other at the grocery store. Up until that day, Lorelai had been trying to pretend that everything was alright, that everything would sort out on its own eventually. Luke had been an ass that day. Plain and simple. She wrapped up the letter saying how much she loved and missed him, then placed it into a matching envelope, sealed it, and placed it the garbage can.

Lorelai tried to carry on with her morning. She got up, showered and dressed, but after that, she didn't do much. By noon, she had fallen back asleep watching a terrible French movie. Chris left her alone, per her request. It was more a, "touch me and die," remark than a request, actually. He felt bad, of course, but what was he to do? She wanted to go home, and he couldn't leave.

The chance of Lorelai and Chris making up was becoming more minuscule by the minute. Lorelai, being the stubborn woman she was, and Chris, the overly proud man that he was, made them two people who couldn't put their past behind them. This one fact had come back to haunt them many times. When Lorelai finally awoke for good at two, Chris was sitting by her side, reading. At first, Lorelai didn't notice what it was he was reading. Her eyes were still sleepy, and without her contacts in, she couldn't see much of anything anyways. The look on Chris's face told her everything she needed to know.

He sat reading, his eyes dashing from right to left, taking in every word written down in her handwriting. Finally, he dropped the letter onto his lap and looked at her.

"What was that, Lor?" He asked.

She squeezed her eyes a few times and reached over to the nightstand to grab her glasses. She looked straight ahead of her. From the second she noticed what he was reading, she knew it would be only a matter of time until she was forced to answer this question.

"It's nothing, really. It's nothing," she said quietly. She continued staring straight ahead, avoiding Chris' gaze.

"It's not nothing. Is everything you said in there true?" Chris looked at her. She refused to look back at him. She was running away from her problems again. Chris reached out and forced her to turn her head towards him. She unhappily obliged and looked up at his eyebrows.

"Mhm," she mumbled. It _was _true. Every word she wrote. What she couldn't understand was why Chris was digging through the garbage to find it.

Chris was crushed. Just absolutely crushed. This time, he was here. He was mature. Never in his dreams did he imagine that Lorelai would be the one to intensify their relationship. She had always been the one with her head screwed on tightly; he was the one with it hanging loosely to the side. He nodded his head to her and let go of her chin. She relaxed and looked down to the mattress.

"Chris, I don't know if I can do this," Lorelai said. This also was true. Every second of every minute of every hour since the night before, her doubt in the relationship had multiplied. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up. She looked at him now. "I'm sorry," she said. He left the room.

…………………………………………………………………………………**.LL…………………………………………………………………………...**

Rory couldn't bring herself to leave Star's Hollow, so she drove back to Lorelai's house, and got in with her key. This had always been her place of refuge. Whenever she was mad at Logan, or Paris, or the rare times she received a bad score on a paper. She plopped herself down on the couch, she remembered the night when she was 16, when she came home after breaking up with Dean in the junkyard. That night had been the hardest of her life. He was her first love, and their breakup was harder than her breakup with Jess or even Logan the first time. She had been sitting right there, in the same spot she was on that couch now, eating cookie dough and wallowing her little heart out. Today, she wasn't hurt, or upset, it was Luke that was hurt and upset. Being the person she was, Rory knew she should stay here for him, in case he threw another tantrum. So she called Logan and told him she was going to stay the night, and then took to the fridge. Of course, there was _nothing _in it except a jug of water from Doose's and some leftover slices of pizza, apparently from before Lorelai left for the City of Lights.

Rory shut the fridge after taking the water and a slice of pizza out. While the pizza was reheating in the oven, (Logan had taught her how to use one,) she poured herself a glass of water and sat down at the table to wait. Ten minutes later, the oven beeped and she took out her dinner, shrieking when she touched the hot cheese. The pizza was thrown on the table atop a napkin. Rory sat back down at the table to eat. It was different eating alone. She's always had Lorelai or Logan to eat with. This was boring. She ate in silence, and when she was finished, whipped out her cell phone to call Lorelai. They hadn't talked yet today.

She dialed the number she knew by heart as she tossed the napkin in the garbage can and the glass in the sink. It rang only once before her mother's warm voice answered on the other end.

"Hey, Mom," Rory said. She wiped her hands on a paper towel and then threw it the garbage can, landing on top of the napkin.

"Hey, Kid. Are you still at Luke's?" Lorelai asked. There was a hint of excitement in her voice when she said his name.

"Nah, I left a little while ago. Are you okay? That call was intense," Rory asked. She had heard everything from Luke's end of the call and could only imagine what was going through Lorelai's head at the time.

"I'm actually a lot better. I screwed that up. I should have talked to him. But I'm ready now, I can do it," Lorelai told Rory. Rory frowned.

"What do you mean, you're ready now?" Rory asked. It wasn't surprising, but Rory wanted to know what was on Lorelai's mind. Lorelai Gilmore was the queen of changing her mind.

"I've figured everything out, Rory. Everything. It was me too, it was me, that messed stuff up Well, sure, he didn't tell me things he should have told me, but still, I shouldn't have made such a huge thing out of it. I mean, I'd be wigged too if I found out I had a kid. Of course, I'd probably know if I had another kid, but that's not the point. I wasn't ignoring him when I told him I couldn't say 'I love you.' I was just protecting myself. I want him to know that. So I wrote him a letter today. Not to send, just to get everything off my chest. You know what I mean?"

"I know."

"But then everything went all wrong. I tossed the letter out in the garbage can in our hotel room and your dad found it. He was pretty mad, and just left."

"Dad found the note?" Rory asked, her eyes wide open.

"Yeah, he did. But I told him I think I still really _do _love Luke. I want to be with him. I want to marry him. I want to—uh oh. I have to go. Bye." And she hung up. Rory looked at her phone and closed it.

……………………………………………………………………………**LL…………………………………………………………………………………**

Lorelai turned around to see Chris standing in the doorway, roses in hand. Lorelai silently cursed herself. "How much of that did you hear?"

"Enough. Airport. Now." He dropped the roses on the desk. She looked at Chris then to the desk and back again. He had a fire in his eyes. Lorelai got up, grabbed her dream book of the dresser where she had thrown it down, and tossed it into her suitcase which she zipped and pulled up the handle of. She looked back at the view and then turned back around, and left without saying a word.

**A/ N: As always, thanks to Katie, my beta, for her work on this chapter. **


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